Attraction

Today I am blogging from my neighborhood Starbucks on Northland Avenue in Appleton, Wisconsin.

Have you ever thought about the kinds of people you attract? Do that. Think for a minute about your circle of friends both past and present. Do you see a pattern? Do you attract people that make you a better person or drag you down and destroy the little bit of positiveness floating around inside you? I want you to focus on that this week. 


About half of my friends are high strung / high energy / worry / focused on negative. These people SHOUT at the traffic around. THEY ARE EASILY ANGERED!!  My phone rings and the conversation in my ear is a LOUD voice wanting to dissect the day of FRUSTRATIONS. I can visualize their fingers tightly curled in fists. GRRRAAHHH! At the end of their rants, I make them tell me something good.


This next paragraph is going to sound a little contradictory and you may scratch your head a bit and for those of you that have facial hair you may even stroke your goatee or beard a bit to fall deep into ponder. Side A.D.D. note - I am wild about facial hair on men. I love it. Serious loveage. I have an entire philosophy about male facial hair and will probably post that at a later date if anyone is interested. Just know I think it's delicious and makes the normal male 5 notches more attractive to me. I enjoy a clean face but if the man in my life wants facial hair he has the green light! MmmMmmM Shelli smiles BIG! I digress. My toleration for negativity is low. We're talking basement low. See I told you it would sound a bit contradictory. Hmming and beard stroking can begin now. I don't walk from the negative Nelly, I run! Negativity will bring you down. At the end of the day I choose my focus. If I have 3 AMAZING things happen and 3 FRUSTRATING things what do I want to think about or verbalize? Why is it so easy to focus on the negative? Having said that, EVERYONE needs to vent. EVERYONE has a bad day every now and then. But, if the negative is your constant mood you will not see or hear from me ever. My high strung friends tell me I am their drug of choice, helping them step back from the ledge, bringing balance and helping them breathe. Opposites sure do attract.  


A handful of friends fall into the melancholy category. Deep thinkers. Very slow to react. Musical.  Artistic. I appreciate them because they force my 100 MPH brain to s l o w  d o w n a bit. Think. Ponder. Consider. Focus. Mindy is melancholy and I love her to pieces. She possesses outstanding listening skills. Mindy and Lisa came to Appleton recently for a girls weekend. Poor Mindy did ALL the listening while Lisa and I flapped our yappers in typical female fashion! YAK YAK YAKITY YAK YAK!! 


What friend is my drug of choice? I enjoy the phlegmatic personality intensely. Laid back leaders. Inspiring. Willing to take charge of a situation, but not annoyingly motivational. No RAH RAH cheerleader complex -- just dig in and get the job done. Heavenly Logical. I have experienced more phlegmatic men as friends than women. Everything they do is smooth. Even the way they talk is calming. This is the friend I seek out to calm me down and even make me laugh. I have a friend in Oregon who is a classic phlegmatic. He has inspired me in so many ways.  He wears many hats at his place of employment and never do I hear him complain. His positive outlook intoxicates me. Some day I will tell him more.


This week think about the people you attract. The conversations in your ear. How are you impacted? Run from the negative. Don't put up with it. Life is way to short. And on the other side of the coin, who are you inspiring? What comes out of your mouth?


I only have time to listen, talk, smile and laugh. Do you want to come along with me for the ride of your life?